I've always had a problem with Christmas. For someone who's jewish - and jewish friends and relatives will corroborate this - it's a sad lonely time. While many people are singing songs, spending time with their families, going to church, eating bountiful meals, exchanging presents, and engaging in any number of holiday related rituals and traditions, many jewish people will often eat Chinese food and go to the movies. Now on any given day, there's nothing wrong with eating dim sum and getting the chance to catch up on the numerous soon-to-be-Oscar-nominated films that are all released this time of year. But knowing that a large percentage of the population is having a joyous holiday while you're eating out of white cardboard containers is akin to having chicken pox and having to sit on the side while the rest of the kiddies get to play in the pool.
For actors it can be a difficult time of year as well if they're unemployed. There are only so many parts to go around in any show so invariably, someone's gonna end up without a job. Imagine being unemployed during the holidays? Yech. If you don't have a lot of money, than affording a plane ticket to see family isn't exactly in the cards. Spend time with friends you say? Many of my friends (both gentile and some who are jewish) are often out of town at this time of year. Lots of folks are too busy it seems to answer an email or answer the phone. And so I confess I've been a VERY grumpy actor at Christmas time. And while lots of folks have tried in vain to reach out to me at this time of year, I fixedly remained a curmudgeon.
The cast of Glorious had the day off for Christmas and I spent most of it in the comfort of my room at the Westin watching videos and eating snacks and napping. Not bad, right? But I was miserable. And somehow, content to be so. I guess when you get into a habit of being grumpy every 25th of December it gets so comfortable that to let go of the grumpiness just ain't easy. You've lived with it so long with the discomfort you almost don't want to let it go.
When we came back to rehearsal today (Dec 26th) I was still a sour puss (in Yiddish we say a 'farbisina punim' - a grim bitter face). I sat at the piano trying to give the day's work its due attention. After lunch Deb and I worked on music with Anthony. As I've said Deb has the challenge of singing badly. She's also creating a character that is based on a real person. Now it's important to understand that professional opera singers are fiercely proud of what they bring to a piece of music. They each have their own interpretations of the great arias in the canon. A diva's gift is her own true voice and Florence Foster Jenkins was no exception. To that end, Anthony and Deb have been very precise about honoring Madame Jenkins original phrasing and interpretations so that you can get a sense of what it was like to hear this highly unusual songstress. Deb will listen to a passage of music and then sing it a half tone sharp or flat on purpose. Imagine singing one song while someone else was singing something entirely different in your ear. Yet even while I marvelled at this I realized I didn't have much 'oomph' myself. Come on Jonas! Get with it brother!
As it happened the theater was not being used for the early part of the day so Paul opted to rehearse in the theater on the set of It's A Wonderful Life. We'll have an entirely different set of course, but since many of us in the company are new to the theater this gave us a chance to get accustomed to working in this somewhat unusual space. Sitting at the piano during a down moment I continued to feel listless. Why was I still in this funk? It was as though some bratty kid inside of me was set on being annoyed at Christmas no matter what. I thought to myself, 'Christmas is not my holiday! I wasn't raised with it. I've not been to a Christmas mass and although I know the story of the Nativity and of the life of Christ and know of his teachings it's never been a part of my consciousness. What I know of Christmas is not based on years of family tradition and fond holiday memories, but, like an outsider looking in, from the post-Thanksgiving songs on the radio and what I see in the movies. When someone says Merry Christmas to me it makes me bristle.' I sat and brooded.
As I sat at the piano letting my attention wander I noticed the script for It's A Wonderful Life on the music stand. I flipped through the pages but still couldn't focus. Looking over at the actors as they rehearsed I thought of the lovely new friends I've made here in the last few days. Deb, who's been so kind and encouraging and who's laugh is completely infectious. Marilyn who invited me to her home on Christmas Day for chili and who introduced me to all of her friends as 'my new friend Jonas'! Bruce who opened his home to me for Christmas Eve and welcomed me into his family. Katie who fearlessly gives so much onstage. Mary Alice - who introduced me to as many people as she could on the first day. Lily and Bill and Jeff who have made sure I had everything I needed to be comfortable. Paul who let me know how very glad he is I'm here. Anthony who is fiercely dedicated and finds such joy in what he does.
I'm darn lucky to be doing something I love with artists who work hard and know how to have fun doing it. What's more, they are as open-hearted in their lives as they are in their work. They have a ready laugh and a smile and always a word of encouragement. I'd been so fixated on feeling low about the holiday time that I'd neglected to see what was right in front of me - joy for the work and for the people I get to share that joy with. I shouldn't kvetch right? I've got a job. I'm not stuck eating by myself with only chopsticks and DVDs to keep me company. This year, my gift has been these new friends, this experience, this theater. And then, wouldn't you know, as I sat at the piano in rehearsal I just happened to flip to the final moments of It's A Wonderful Life. The main character George Bailey is given a copy of Tom Sawyer. He opens it and reads the inscription that his new friend a newly winged angel named Clarence has penned for him: "Dear George, Remember, no man is a failure who has friends. Clarence."
Check back frequently for more from Guest Blogger, Jonas Cohen, and others as we take Glorious! from the rehearsal hall to the stage.
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